Saturday, October 1, 2016

Week 31: The Wedding

The week was full of Festivity 🌟💐🎈🎉 So much that even though we saw it through a small television screen, it was as though happening in our homes.. And rightly so, because Dev and Sonakshi have become a very important part of our everyday life over the last 150+ days! I personally had to reschedule a few appointments on friday, so that I don't miss the wedding 😁😄

The zone of reality that the makers are trying to set their story in, has once again proved very successful this week 👍🏻👍🏻

Before we go on to the Festive mode... there is one last thing to talk about. one last emotional battle that they have to fight..well, this time, its just Dev - alone without Sona's support.

I always wonder - if there is nothing that can be done about it, why do the doctors even tell us about it...😏😏 Ignorance is bliss, don't you agree? But then it is the duty of the doctors to tell what they found. For us, when we hear a medical diagnosis for the first time, its very tough - we never thought we will ever have it! And the difficulty doubles, if its actually a diagnosis for our loved one - reason, we cant even do anything about it!

For Dev, the difficulty is many folds. Sonakshi's "in-hospitable uterus" is not just a diagnosis, its a shattered dream about their tiny Sonakshi and tiny Abhodro. And its even more than that. Its a fear of losing Sonakshi once again.. Its such a touchy subject that its hard to predict how each of them will react if they come to know. I empathize with him.

I am really in awe of the sudden temperament change in Dev 😊 Whether its his interaction with Sona's parents or his interaction with even Sona..there is an honest calmness and a sincere tolerance of all thats new to him. In spite of all the storm in his head, he managed a very sweet conversation over phone with Sona, when he promised her for many beautiful memories in their life together.

With the confusion about the diagnosis in mind, Dev and us got ready for the Sangeet!

But Sonakshi is unaware of any of these. So, sky is the limit for her happiness..She was just unable to stop her smile and Dev was just having a hard time keeping his mind stress free and happy.. He cannot hide the language his eyes speak to Sona, can he?! He was not saying any lies when he told her that it was the fear of losing her...Well acted, Dev 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 Eyes are your asset, Shaheer! Always protect those expressive eyes 😍😍 One more well executed scene by the team, especially Shaheer 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 At the end of the song, I really liked our show's version of the song, so much more than the actual movie version ❤️ The meaning of the song, suited so well for our Dev and his expressions were fantastic! The song that played during the night of DevkiDeewangi as well as this one suits our show perfectly!

I think Sonakshi described the event very aptly..as if they are in a border fighting with their troops! When two families from different cultures get into a relationship, its not easy at all! Especially in the matters pertaining to customs.. But what makes Dev and Sona one unique couple, is the way they understand each other.  Sona's strength is her mind that is able to understand and adapt to the different situations and Dev's strength is his heart which has the immense power of Love that can conquer everything ❤️

I was particularly reminded of the time during Neha's wedding, when Neha's wedding scarf was put on Sona's head by Nikki and how maami and Ishwari got wild. Acknowledging the fact that she was hurt and it wasn't even her mistake, Dev immediately went behind to pacify her..and spoke to her with so much of respect and love.. and similarly Sonakshi had always been very matured in handling these things. In any other TV show, one maami character will create so much of drama over every opportunity..and the heroine and hero will probably go through a turmoil of emotions every single time! Every house, sure has a power packed maami character, but she is powerless, if love is the language we speak! This show is all about love and thats what makes it special :)

Whatever happens around us, lets divert all our focus on Dev and Sonakshi and the love that got them this far!

What a beautiful road side romantic dance! They truly complete each other. It was a dance celebrating an important milestone....it was the last night in which they are just a boyfriend, girlfriend... Soon they are going to be husband and wife. Soon they will have to accept the love and craziness of both their families equally. When I look back and see the path they took to come here at this night..the one thing that stands out for me is the respect they have for each other without any ego. Although they both are individually quite strong headed, they have surely put all their ego aside and made Love as their language. And I sincerely hope that this be the case throughout their life.

In India, every state has unique customs and every caste has its own beliefs and inspite of so many differences, we are one and that makes our country unique! No other country in this world can have so much of unity inspite of the diversity we have. We can be proud of that. This is the larger picture.

However, zooming in to the families that have to embrace the differences - its not easy. A custom that is considered auspicious in a community may be considered inauspicious in another! For example, the "ulu-dhwani" sound that bengalis make, is an auspicious sound for them. However, in some parts of India, its a sound made in funerals! The fish is a very auspicious part of Bengali culture. However, for brahmins, fish or egg or for that matter even onion and garlic are considered non-sathwik food and is completely prohibited, and is even considered a sin to have such a food nearby the holy fire.

When a man and a woman from different communities fall in love and expect their parents to accept them and the partner they have chosen, they must also be prepared to go through these hardships. The worst thing is, when in Love, everything else dims out and therefore we may not even have analysed all these things.. Dev and Sona, am sure love each other to moon and back. Its important to keep that love in tact forever, because thats what is going to bind them together even when everything else goes against them.

It was DevAkshikiShaadi finally! And the social media was full of laughter, beautiful photo edits, videos, poems and what not. It almost felt like a wedding in our own homes. The makers made it such a grand affair! The set was huge, the actors were looking beautiful. It was truly awesome. I really loved the way the bride looked at the groom for the first time! It was such a sweet entry 😄❤️😍 And the garland exchange was very sweet and cute.. Just like the couple 😊 Other than that and a couple of other scenes, Dev and Sona were not even shown as much and I was extremely impressed with the makers for showing the reality.

In marriages like this or in any proper traditional marriage, its always the customs and rituals of the 2 families that are more important than even the bride and the groom. The focus was rightly kept on the specific Bengali traditions that differed from the traditions of the Dixit family...

Like the bride not wearing the Lehenga that the mother-in-law got for her. Asha's careful and honest reply to that was heartwarming. Truly, every community is different and beautiful :) 

Mehendi made from a plant is considered auspicious for a woman, especially during marriage in the Dixit family who follow the brahmin customs. That is replaced by Alta. I know that Mehendi is natural and I believe Alta is somewhat man made and considered artificial because although its made from an insect its later refined by adding some chemicals. Bengalis use Alta because its more bright red in color than Mehendi and resembles blood which is a symbol of fertility and prosperity. I don't mean to say that one is better than the other - I am just pointing out the difference so that we can respect both traditions.

Well..from the groom's side.. the disappointment is that this is the marriage of their only son and they are just an audience, unable to have any say on the rituals. From the bride's side, its a disappointment that even though they got to do things as per their own traditions, the family where their daughter is going to live forever is not happy and content and the environment seems so dull and unfulfilling.

But I must say, it was good to breeze through all these in just 1 day..Any other show would have dwelled on the Lehenga issue for 2 or 3 days and the Mehendi issue for 4 or 5 days.

For that matter, I would also like to give credits to the makers for keeping Neha's issues aside. Whenever I see Neha with that long sad face, I am very worried for her. Who doesn't need money in this world! Even a Tata and an Ambani need it to increase the number of cars they own from 500 to 501! And Neha is only asking for an air conditioner in her home or a refrigerator and whats wrong in that:( However, a contented heart perceives every little blessing as a mighty treasure - isn't it?  Well.. lets keep that part aside. From this wedding angle, Neha has a big role in her brother's wedding as per the brahmin tradition. She is the one that has to drape the bride's saree and she is the one that has to even tie the knot of the holy union of her brother and his wife. Its the "right" of the groom's sister. By missing this in her brother's wedding, she and Ishwari know fully well that she will never get an opportunity in her life to do this. But, I was very glad that they let it go with a smiling face :) Thats how it should be, when Love is more important than anything else.

I have already spoken a lot about Non vegetarian/Vegetarian food last week and I am not going to bore you all again with that! Its a big deal for the older generation, especially, to have the non vegetarian food around. When my parents come to visit me in this foreign land, I am staying in, I know how hard it is for me to search for a pure vegetarian restaurant!

Thank God for maama and Asha. Even though Mami and Dadi bhua sprinkled their color of grey...the color that popped out in the end was the color of love, red ❤️❤️❤️ The wedding was over without any big issue. The Goodbye was short and extremely emotional and did not fail to bring those tears from our eyes. When a daughter is wedded and given away, there surely is an emptiness in her family.. an emptiness that may never ever be filled and who knows this better than our own Dev! A warm caring touch is all she really needed and Dev was right there for her ❤️😊

Even though a big happy DevAkshi union happened this week, somehow there is an unexplainable sadness inspite of the swelling happiness... isn't it? And its not really because of maami or dadi or Bejoy..And its not really because of any intentionally planned/schemed drama... The last scene of the week, with the fish and the heartfelt apologies depicted exactly this emotion.. Nothing was intentional..Please let any of this not affect the love between our dear Dev and Sona.. In reality thats how it will be, especially when 2 completely different communities come together. Life is not a bollywood movie that shows what we want to see. 

Whatever happened, let it be. We wish the young couple a happy married life. Now, go make lots of good memories for you and us to cherish for years to come.

ps. The doctors have given 7% chance for Sonakshi to become a mother. 7% is PLENTY for a miracle to happen. When its time for God's precious child to come to earth, no-one can stop that from happening! So enjoy life, be happy and thankful for today 😄❤️😍

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